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June 15 2017

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onedayyoujustchange:

katzedecimal:

titenoute:

hiddlesherethereeverywhere:

pr1nceshawn:

Tips That Can Save Your Kid’s Life.

THIS IS IMPORTANT 

When I was a child, from the time I was about four and could understand things, my mom told me and my brother that we should have a secret word. That way, if we were ever in trouble or felt unsafe and we didn’t want the people around us to know we needed her to come get us, we could let her know. So she let us pick the word and my brother and I chose the phrase “peanut butter cups.” (I’m happy to share the phrase now since both my brother and I are adults now). 

I used the phrase twice in my life. Once, I was at a friends house when I eight years old. Her dad got really drunk and was throwing things against the wall. I was really scared and I didn’t want to draw attention to myself on the phone when I called my mom to come get me because I didn’t know if he would get more violent if I asked her to come get me. So I called her and was calm and after a couple minutes I asked “Hey mommy, did you get me those peanut butter cups from the store?” And she said “I’ll be right there.” And she came and got me within minutes. 

Second, I was a teenager spending the night at a friends house. Her brother and dad were drinking and they started talking about things that made me uncomfortable - ie: what they liked to do to women. My friend didn’t seem perturbed and said that was normal for them and that I shouldn’t worry. But I was worried because they were really drunk and I was 15 and the only ‘woman’ around that wasn’t related to them. I went in my friends room, told her I needed to call my mom and say goodnight. Before I hung up with her I asked “Next time we go to the store, can we get some peanut butters cups? I’ve been craving them.” And she came and got me, just like that. 

Two incidents, one as a young child, one years later as a teen. Don’t discredit this stuff, it fucking works. My brother used it a few times too. Let your child pick the word and no never, ever, ever, ever get mad at them for using it no matter what it is. 

DO NOT SCROLL PAST THAT.

And if your child does tell you, for gods sakes BELIEVE THEM!!!!!!!!

One of the tips we teach our 3-5 year old Tae Kwon Do students  is if someone grabs them to yell “YOU”RE NOT MY MOM (or DAD)” we also teach them how to get out of a hold when someone grabs them by the arm. 

its not fool proof but as one parent discovered, people will respond when a child yells that. (His 4 year old daughter wanted to show him what she learned in class that day. other shoppers and store employees converged on the scene… it was interesting to say the least). 

Reposted bycavebearRedHeadCathCharmaquestAnalnyKarambolkrybusmemesjaszinzynierowcaajanuschytrustomashluke1danoniskonesraitxalbananowohaftowanaksiezniczkavictorianssssskreska-groteskarugiavigilteijakoolDagarhenmarbear

iopele:

voxiferous:

grumpsaesthetics:

grumpsaesthetics:

every year around christmas me and my grandma play this fun family game called “maybe you want to put jesus in your room instead, sweetie? :)”. now, it’s important to note that the jesus referred to in our game is not actually the real jesus christ, but instead a wooden figure i made in 2011 that has an uncanny resemblance to the lord and savior himself

so what happens is that i place jesus in our living room, and my grandma smiles and asks me if i don’t want to decorate my room with him instead. i ask her in return if she thinks my jesus figure is ugly (which he is), but she reassures me that this is not the case. however, a couple of days later jesus mysteriously disappears from our living room, and appear in my room instead

now, the real jesus christ might have been able to perform a miracle like this, but please remember that the jesus in our story is only a figure made out of wood. he can not move on his own, so i think we can safely say that my grandma is the prime suspect here

the first year i would often confront my grandma about this, but she would always make up an excuse and never straight up tell me she moved him because he’s so ugly it’s an embarrassment to the family

eventually i grew tired of her lies, so now we only move jesus around in silence. one second he’s in the living room, the next he’s back in my room. in a way i think this adds an extra element of excitement to the holiday season, because you never know for sure when jesus is going to be moved again

and so it begins..

i was not fucking ready for this photograph

… this photo makes the whole thing so much better and I cannot stop laughing help I need oxygen

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fruitsgood:

tsunderetonic:

fruitsgood:

tsunderetonic:

captumbleweed:

Isn’t this the pancake boy?

No.

it is absolutely the pancake boy

proofs?

BEHOLD!!!!!!

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intpmusings:

I’m a laid-back person with a ton of anxiety.

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nerdbotmk2:

last night i found the most perfect christmas card of all time

i bought it, but i am keeping it for myself.

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nocturna7:

Night night..😽🛏💤☄💋

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beshertolockthedoor:

niveaserrao:

Parks and Rec gets real. 

Parks and Rec is always real.

chocolatequeennk:

haliasjane:

inbetweenfictionandreality:

“I waited too long to read the sequel, and now I can’t even remember the characters.”

 A novel by me

“I read the whole series in less than two days, and now can’t separate the events of individual books” the thrilling sequel

“I’ve read so much fanfic for this series, I can’t remember what really happened in the books” the stunning conclusion

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atacoinside:

johnnyjoestarrelatable:

dynastylnoire:

thawrah:

8figs:

with huge noses and over lined lips

I JUST HAD TO CLOSE MY EYES FOR A SECOND AND LIKE……..DIGEST THIS WHA T THE HELL

You know why

clowns actually originated in egypt to entertain royalty- they wore weird masks and imitated gods.  there were also clowns in ancient china, greece, and italy. it wasn’t “black face and then switched to white face” like i saw in the notes– the clown white paint was invented in 1801

the big, red nose is associated with alcoholism/being drunk (heavy alcohol usage can lead to severe rosacea and swelling of the nose), because drunkards in ye olde times were seen as fun for the whole family. the overlined lips create an exaggerated smile). curly or big hair was seen as whimsical and fun, as was a lack of hair (if you look up ‘vintage clowns’, you’ll see their hair is puffed out to the sides or upwards. nowadays, people probably wear afros because they’re cheap, and don’t involve lots of styling. 

imageimage

i am passionate about clowns

They are a terrifying breed of monster, and must be eradicated from the face of the earth, but it’s relieving to know they weren’t born from a place of racial prejudice.

REBLOG IF YOU HELLA STRESSED

theboywhoreadsbooks:

punkscully:

me: reads the bad reviews of a book i didn’t like to seek validation

I’m bitter like that

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onlyblackgirl:

dynastylnoire:

sweet-fiber-flips:

Ben and Jerry’s gives No Shits

Yooooooo
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I love Benny & Jay

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dcvertigodaily:

Barbara Gordon in Batman: The Cat and The Bat.

June 14 2017

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i only accept 1 form of catcalling

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babyanimalgifs:

that’s the last straw

Reposted bymieteq mieteq
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braincooksidea:

new-boot-goofin:

trainingforstarfleet:

How beautiful is it that we’ve lived long enough to see our childhood princess become generals? And best of all, little girls will always see them as both

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